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Running an Integral Salon

Last post 02-27-2007, 10:31 PM by pattye. 7 replies.
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  •  02-21-2007, 6:37 PM 19554

    • guydavis is not online. Last active: 09-25-2008, 8:30 AM guydavis
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    Running an Integral Salon

    Hello everyone. Please excuse me if this is the wrong place to post this. I am a member of an Integral Salon in Western NC. We've been meeting for 6 months now and are facing several challenges.

    I'd like to start a dialogue about how best to address these challenges and also connect with other Salon Coordinators online.

    Firstly we have a very small group although we've been meeting for some time. We have not actively promoted the group which is something I will be starting to do shortly. I have a meetup Ken Wilber group which will promote the meetings and a Zaadz profile which I'll also use. I will also begin to post flyers in various locations in the area to promote the group. We have several health food restaurants and stores in the area.

    One of the major challenges we are faced with is members with a center of gravity in Green. With my lack of Integral experience I am having trouble supporting them in healthy translation or even knowing if my assessments of unhealthy Green are even valid. At first I wanted to transform them and have been dealing with my shadows regarding this.

    There is one specific case I'd like feedback on. There is a member of the group who insists on speaking about how "we are all one", "everything is perfect the way it is", "things are unfolding just as spirit wants", etc.

    It has been my assessment that those statements do not serve him or the group because he is saying these things from a place that is not grounded in the non-dual or causal. Admittedly this is my perspective which could be dead wrong. Ken speaks of this in the September 29th entry of One Taste.

    Based on my limited experience with David Deida I feel like these statements do not open the group up but create suffering.

    Now as a coordinator/facilitator I'm struggling with several things here.

    1. What serves the group
    2. What serves this member
    3. What consitutes unhealthy Amber, Orange and Green
    4. How do I create a place for people to translate in healthy ways at their current stage
    5. How do I create a place for people to support transformation to the next stage

    I'd love to hear what other members have to offer.

    Guy Davis
    guy@dancelovers.com
    http://www.dancelovers.com
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  •  02-24-2007, 9:23 AM 19646 in reply to 19554

    Re: Running an Integral Salon


    hi guy!

    my immediate thought, hopefully from an integral perspective, is that this guy who says 'we are all one' is right! after all, everybody is right. but within limits. so, encourage him to look beyond that statement, because even though it sounds like a final statement, it's not, thank God. isn't that why we're here, because Spirit would be incredibly bored if there were nothing but One?

    it's great hearing from you,

    ralph

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  •  02-24-2007, 10:07 PM 19666 in reply to 19646

    • ats is not online. Last active: 09-24-2008, 4:23 PM ats
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    Re: Running an Integral Salon

    Yes, I would agree that it's only a partial statement.  In fact, it's based on partial data, and the conclusion is faulty.

    While I agree that we are all One, I am almost 100% certain that Big Mind doesn't have a specific end goal in mind.  That falls prey to the myth of the given world.  If it is unfolding, then there is only one right way, and all other perspectives are wrong. (a little Green contradiction there)

    And, from the Big Heart perspective, I would say that I feel a push from above to grow my Yin/Yang Compassion.  None of the wisdom traditions claim that Spirit has an end goal in mind.  They all assert that Spirit is trying to "remember", or "discover" itself.  We are Spirit's imminent expression of that desire.  I am living Spirit's desire when I am pursuing growth.

     I would make an ILP checklist (the 4 modules) for the group to use.  I would have them choose a Big Mind practice, and a Big Heart practice to seriously follow.  I would make routine shadow work mandatory.  Then, I would make support groups to encourage folks to stick with each module.  A one or two page checklist would do fine.  If you can work in the four quadrants and stages of development, even better.

    I am working on a way to modify Genpo's voice dialog to create the inner child at the core of myself, and each stage from infra-red through 3rd tier as layers that cover the inner child.  I find that most of my projections come from the early stages, and am working to reintegrate my early disassociations.  Each layer has to let go of it's learned protective patterns and give up control to the higher stages.

    As for fascilitating change, meditation is the key component.  Meditation alone accelerates the process of development.  Couple that with shadow work and a good dose of knowledge, and call me in a few years.


    myspace.com/zentaimusic
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  •  02-25-2007, 8:18 AM 19675 in reply to 19554

    Re: Running an Integral Salon

    As a teacher, I've thought very seriously about how to teach to a variety of developmental levels.  I offer you the things that seem to work well for my students and myself:

    Wherever people are, developmentally, is exactly where they need to be, until they need to be somewhere else.  Remember, life is about the journey, not the destination, and that means that it is more important to enjoy, and focus our attention on, wherever we are now, in the present, than to worry about where we are going in the future.  The only way we get lost is if we stop paying attention to the present, and stop enjoying what we have right now.

    We are the best experts for our own learning - we know better than anyone else what works best for us.   So we are best served by being offered a variety of learning experiences and styles from which we are free to choose the ones that suit us best.

    Even Universal Truths (if there are any!) will look different from different perspectives so, unless we are omniscient, we'll never know the whole truth.  Only when we understand this, and approach others from this place of unknowing, are we able to learn, and teach, wisely.

    Learning is most effective when it is fun.  If we are not having fun, we're doing something wrong.  The formula for happiness is moderate challenge + meaning.  In a group setting this is best done when each of us has the option to choose to participate in a role that intersts us (meaning) as well as that makes use of our particular takents and skills (challenge) on a level that we are happy with (moderation).

    We also learn most effectively when mistakes are encouraged and embraced!  We need a healthy respect for the usefulness and importance of making mistakes, if we are able to feel brave enough to learn the really interesting stuff.  (Remember, you can't learn to walk without falling down, a lot!)

    And, most importantly, realize that we are doing this all for ourselves first and foremost.  If we are enjoying ourselves, learning, finding meaning, and encountering moderate challenge, then it's all good.  If other people also enjoy themselves, learn, find meaning, and encounter moderate challenge, then thats just a bonus!  That goes for the teacher and the students, because, really, we are all both students and teachers.

    Peace, Love, and Bicycles,
    Turtle
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  •  02-27-2007, 3:27 PM 19738 in reply to 19675

    • guydavis is not online. Last active: 09-25-2008, 8:30 AM guydavis
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    Re: Running an Integral Salon

    I want to thank everyone who posted here. You've given me a lot to chew on and I'm really grateful for the support on this forum.

    Guy Davis
    guy@dancelovers.com
    http://www.dancelovers.com
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  •  02-27-2007, 3:48 PM 19740 in reply to 19738

    • bobyu is not online. Last active: 12-19-2007, 5:07 PM bobyu
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    Re: Running an Integral Salon

    As the Montreal Ken Wilber meetup host, I faced a similar challenge, in that how do I run an integral meetup where most of the people are at Green? Especially when there is only 3 or 4 people?

    The previous Montreal Ken Wilber meetup flamed out because nobody really stepped up and took leadership in giving a firm shape and boundary to the meetup. Almost a year ago I reluctantly became a meetup host to fulfill an assignment that I chose to undertake in a spiritual seminar.

    What I decided to do was basically the opposite of the previous version. First there was only an emphasis on practice, led by me. That means no sharing of personal experiences. After everybody has had turns in sharing his own experiences, then there was nothing left to cohere the group for further meetings.

    The practice is something of an amalgamation of Deida's practice and Enlightened Communication by Andrew Cohen and my free-wheeling version of Voice Dialogue.

    Any new member who did not like this left immediately. That was great for it filtered out all the heavily Green people right away, according to my own perception. Only those who are comfortable with my leadership and who actually get something out of the meetup stay.

    Now because I have been trained to be a martial art teacher, I have no problem leading the group via verbal instructions as well as leading different meditative and inquiry exercises, even though I am not an expert in any one of them.

    But I am extremely happy with the way things are going, for it is truly an intersubjective adventure in navigating the integral waters.

    Above all, I decided that it was _my_ meetup (since I am paying for it), and I was going to be 100% responsible for everything and everyone - and that implied that I would have to kick people out. Luckily the people whom I felt were closing the group in via their subtle stubbornness left, so I never had to do that.

    Hope this helps.

    Bob

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  •  02-27-2007, 10:16 PM 19764 in reply to 19554

    Re: Running an Integral Salon

    However,  After reading the other posts, I am wondering Guy if the person you speak of is embodying and attitude.  In other words speaking of that which he does not really understand that KW speaks about.  Which could bring forth many re-actions from the group and then having new people, I could understand that you want to know a way to deal with this.   The only way I have found is to ask a question, sincerely to ask him/her to elaborate on that so that others might get more of a flavor what that means to her.  And then there is another way that does have to be used gently and with much presence.  Example:  If person is talking from the head up and not being in touch with the body, you can ask the question and wait.  Silence

    or listen to what is said while observing.  Then start to get creative.  Go and sit closer to the person.  Or use the same hand motions or anything used that has movement other than the neck up.  ONe time I got up and went and sat at a client's feet after listening forever to how wonderful her husband was as he ws having an affair with another woman. to be cont. next Post

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  •  02-27-2007, 10:31 PM 19765 in reply to 19740

    Re: Running an Integral Salon

    And there are times to use something like Bob described. What I said in my last post as I cont. in this post is describing a gentle approach for those who might be starting to break thru to a higher altitude and we are not ever sure, at least I am not.  There is a sensing and the body speaks. And the body never lies.  Anyhow, I just knew to move close and I had had all I could take about her wonderment of a husband and her speaking only from the neck up.  At the same time, I was just moved to move.  It is the movement that changes things. And that can be used in all kinds of creative ways. As soon as I sat down at her feet , not crowding her, our eyes met and I saw the recognition in her eyes and she completely let go and started talking about this son of a bitch bastard that she had married and her hands were waving and she moved her hips on the couch and leaned into me and back and on and on.  Another example is if someone is totally insulting, you can just slap your knee and get up quickly, exagerating your movement and leave the room.  come back and act like nothing happened and say you had to go to the bathroom.  Usually the person will totally change in some way,as will the group..  Never know.  Now again, this is to be used with all humility and has tocome from our highest selves.  It is a sacred thing and we cannot go stomping  around in our big muddy boots unless that is a gift used with care. Amen. Pattye   This is an offering that is hard to share.
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